How to overcome the fear of online dating

Over the past decade, we have seen a massive change in how dating website are perceived. Nowadays, to find love and a long-term partner, most singles do not hesitate to use an online dating service. Why? Because they know that with their busy lifestyles, these websites or apps can help them to increase their chances of success without taking too much time away from their daily routine.

However, for some people, there is still a stigma attached to online dating - despite it becoming more of a norm, communicating about it seems to be the biggest hurdle. For many singles, talking about using a dating website is still uncommon. Whilst it is improving, not all couples will reveal to friends, family or colleagues, that they met on a dating website.

Indeed, social acceptance has improved a lot. However, some singles may be afraid to explain why they use online dating services, this could be down to the single "desperation" stigma, or for couples, the desire to have a more traditional romantic story.

If a man doesn't want to talk about his use of a dating website, it's probably because he doesn't want it to seem like he can't approach people in public. For years, society and the media has dictated that men have to be comfortable approaching women and charming them whenever and wherever they want. This imposes a certain amount of pressure on men.

If a woman doesn't want to talk about it, it's normally because of two reasons: the first is that she's afraid of looking desperate. The second is that after a divorce, for example, family and friends don't expect her to get straight back into dating. Even in the 21st century, there's still more pressure for women to focus on children and family life than finding a new partner.

What singles should remember is that there's no shame in looking for a partner. They should use the means that best suits them, because after years on their own or with the same partne it can be daunting to connect emotionally and physically with someone new. The experience is different for everyone. Some people may be ready to date soon after the death of a spouse; others need to take their time and build their confidence again and some could take years to move past the emotions of a divorce. Whether the goal is to find a dancing partner or a romantic partner for life, the important thing is to make an effort to get out there and live your life to the full.

Beyond the social acceptance of using an online dating service, some other fears may prevent singles from registering for the first time. Here are some tips to overcome these:

1. Check the security of the website
Before registering for the first time with a dating website, you should be sure about how safe the site is. Ask yourself these questions: is this website protecting my data and photos? What is going to happen to my information? What is this website doing to avoid scammers?
If the website can answer these three questions well, you can focus on what really matters to you - looking for the ideal partner.

2. The fear of finding the "one in a million"
Another thing that can prevent singles from registering on a dating website is the idea of getting lost in a sea of profiles. To avoid this feeling, go for websites that can provide quality over quantity. If there is a certain criteria that is most important to you, try a niche or matchmaking dating service that will offer only compatible profiles.

3. Don't be discouraged
If you're just starting to date after a divorce or the end of a long-term relationship, remember it's not that easy to be back in the dating game after such a long break. But try not to put too much pressure on yourself! What you have to remember is this: it's rare to meet the one after just one date – and that's for the best! With two or three different dates, you can improve your conversational and social skills, maybe even try flirting, and learn more about what it is that you really want. You might even surprise yourself!

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