My married lover won't commit

Agony Aunt's picture

Dear Patricia Marie,

My married boyfriend won't confirm if he is coming to share Christmas with me and constantly avoids the subject.  We have been together for two years and he promised me last Christmas that this year he would leave his wife and be all mine, but nothing's changed. He says there is never a right time to tell his wife that he's leaving her for me, but that he will sort it in the new year. I want to believe him but I don't feel I can trust him anymore.

My sister is going away for Christmas and wants me to join her, but I don't know what to do.

Patricia Marie says...

There are far too many women out there waiting for their married lovers to leave their wives, but more often than not, these cheating men never do and continue to keep their options open. Even if your lover did eventually leave his wife, remember that very true saying; "When a man marries his mistress, he creates a vacancy".

My advice to you is to book that holiday with your sister or you may just find yourself alone and very upset on Christmas Day. Instead of hanging around for more empty promises, stop wasting your time on someone who is already spoken for.

Make 2019 the year you finally accept you are worth more than being somebody's mistress and go and find what you do deserve - your very own man. 

Patricia Marie, our Agony Aunt, wants to hear your problems, dilemmas, and quarrels. Just email them to