The Diary of Miss Darcy Bustle: 10 November


There was sadness at home this weekend when we discovered that Robby the goldfish had died. He’d been swimming on his side for a few days and appeared to be off his food before he finally floated to the top of the tank for the last time. His pals, Rose and Ronaldo, seemed rather sad too and were swimming at one end of the tank until he was lifted out. The editor did try and revive him by putting him in a bowl of fresh water and blowing bubbles through a straw at him but the only effect that had was to confirm his status as one who had already decided to move on.
He was already quite old when I arrived 18 months ago but we weren’t really friends – it’s difficult to be friends with a goldfish if you’re a dog as we don’t have any shared interests. Still, I was sad to see him go and I snuggled up to Duffle for comfort this evening. He’s older than me and told me that goldfish often ‘head off’ as he called it. Although he didn’t make it clear where they ‘headed off’ to...


When I got home from work this evening, a special little coffin had been made for Robby out of a Cook’s Matches box. It had a little pillow of cotton wool and a nice scrap of velvet from the sewing box. I felt quite weepy when we all headed to the back of the garden, buried him under the rose bush and sang a little song. Lulu Guinness, on the other hand, got into terrible trouble for trying to dig him up later and eat him. Ugh. She really is a naughty cat. She said she was sorry, but she obviously wasn’t. So to be on the safe side, he has now been moved to a secret location (under the camellia). 


I spent the whole day today practising my tricks repertoire because I am going to have to go with Melonie soon to write a piece on the Teach My Pet How to Do That experts from the television. I am going to be asked to do something very hard. Why me? Aren’t there any other dog writers out there? 


For weeks the building on Maiden Lane directly  opposite our editorial office has been full of builders hard at work renovating one of the flats. The question we all wanted to know was: who was it for? This afternoon I found out the answer when I walked in to discover James, Melonie and Kath all cooing out of the window at a small ginger cat staring back at us from the comfort of the newly decorated flat opposite. We don’t  know it's name so we keep calling it Flat Cat. They keep taking photos of this new interloper and attracting its attention. It really is too much! 


I’ve decided I need a day off to calm down and try and get over my jealousy about Flat Cat. After all, I have lots of friends and even have my own Instagram account. Flat Cat doesn’t have that. So far...