Toilet Trouble
How far would you go to spend a penny? Does 250 miles seem too far? The answer (of course) really does depend on how much you want the loo. A Victorian, high-level cistern, with its original pull chain and lovely porcelain bowl? For anyone determined to deck out a traditional bathroom, it was impossible to resist. Admittedly, it was in Liverpool, and extremely heavy, but why worry about the small details?
Ebay is based on the concept that we all live in the same village, that here is a 24-hour marketplace open to all. Its fast-action pages deliver almost anything you could possibly want, or you didn’t realise you wanted, and Rock House is fast becoming a depository for a collection of irresistible finds.
At the last count, this included two sofas, two sinks, a pair of patio doors, a large New World cooker from the 1960s (I may have mentioned that one before), three sets of taps, and now a loo. At £52.07, it was a bargain. A bidding triumph. And a logistical nightmare. As with anything bought on eBay, the winner is contacted shortly afterwards to discuss how you plan to collect the item. Dave was no exception. How was I planning to get this cumbersome item out of his house?
I knew that there was little chance of persuading Mark to make a 500-mile round trip to collect a loo that he didn’t know I’d bought – like most wives, I tend to operate on a need-to-know basis. But I didn’t want Dave to worry. ‘I have friends driving back from Liverpool,’ I emailed. ‘They’ll be round.’
Sadly, keen as they were to help, Gail and Carly’s two-seater sports car was already fully engaged carting them, their luggage and their two large terriers back down the motorway and a roof rack with a WC on top just wasn’t an option for a soft-top. Dave said he was sorry to hear that, but it wasn’t really his problem. And by the way, he wanted cash on collection. Why should he pay the extra £2.70 PayPal charge?
Why indeed. In the end, I was saved by Shipley, a glorious online service that works as a clearing house for van drivers nationwide. You put in your details and they send a quote. In my case, they put me in touch with Slawek, who not only collected my loo but also gave Dave the £2.70. Proving that, despite the trend for all things unisex, there is still a need for the gents.
Next week: Straying away
Ebay is based on the concept that we all live in the same village, that here is a 24-hour marketplace open to all. Its fast-action pages deliver almost anything you could possibly want, or you didn’t realise you wanted, and Rock House is fast becoming a depository for a collection of irresistible finds.
At the last count, this included two sofas, two sinks, a pair of patio doors, a large New World cooker from the 1960s (I may have mentioned that one before), three sets of taps, and now a loo. At £52.07, it was a bargain. A bidding triumph. And a logistical nightmare. As with anything bought on eBay, the winner is contacted shortly afterwards to discuss how you plan to collect the item. Dave was no exception. How was I planning to get this cumbersome item out of his house?
I knew that there was little chance of persuading Mark to make a 500-mile round trip to collect a loo that he didn’t know I’d bought – like most wives, I tend to operate on a need-to-know basis. But I didn’t want Dave to worry. ‘I have friends driving back from Liverpool,’ I emailed. ‘They’ll be round.’
Sadly, keen as they were to help, Gail and Carly’s two-seater sports car was already fully engaged carting them, their luggage and their two large terriers back down the motorway and a roof rack with a WC on top just wasn’t an option for a soft-top. Dave said he was sorry to hear that, but it wasn’t really his problem. And by the way, he wanted cash on collection. Why should he pay the extra £2.70 PayPal charge?
Why indeed. In the end, I was saved by Shipley, a glorious online service that works as a clearing house for van drivers nationwide. You put in your details and they send a quote. In my case, they put me in touch with Slawek, who not only collected my loo but also gave Dave the £2.70. Proving that, despite the trend for all things unisex, there is still a need for the gents.
Next week: Straying away